Double Rainbows

So as some of you already know, on Friday I received wonderful news from UNC-Chapel Hill. They have accepted me into their Philosophy PhD program. One school, that's all I needed. Granted, I could still be accepted into one of the other 4 programs, but for now, one is all I need to have. So law is out, and philosophy is in. I can't convey my excitement. I'm shocked and overjoyed.

Now let me back up. The news came on my mom's birthday, and she had some encouraging words not just about school but for this whole year. Word has it (in the prophetic circles) that this is the year of both new beginnings and double blessings. The proof is supposed to be an abundance of double rainbows this year. Before knowing this, I could tell that this year was going to be a year of change and new beginnings. I've been on the whirlwind of change this year, and it's been great. Going to France has been an experience in itself. I've made wonderful friends here and I've had some time (a lot of time!) to figure out where my true passion lies. Here's how it happened.

Well I've been gung ho about law school since forever, and last year I was accepted to Cornell. But I decided that I needed to spend a year doing something else before I sold my soul to the devil. Cornell is a great school, but it because it wasn't my top choice I didn't feel the need to go right away (had I gotten into Yale or UVA I would be in law school right now, which is a horrifying thought). I was happy to get into Cornell, but slightly disappointed. But now I realize that I had I gotten in elsewhere, I wouldn't be in France this year, and now I'm glad the other schools did turn me down. When I decided to come to France, I remember explaining to Dana that it was good to take a year off and decide if law school is really for me (since I had yet to determine what I wanted to do with a law degree, and it's an expensive decision so one ought to be more sure than I was). She asked me, "If you go to France, would you ever actually decide not to go to law school?" It was a good question, and in my mind then answer was no. Not that I wanted it that badly, but I had no other options. It was law school or the streets (so to speak). But still, it's good to say that you're going to make sure it's what God wants you to do (ha! how little I realized).

When I got here I started working on philosophy independently (thanks to Harry!), and I even got one of my classes to do contemporary moral issues. I loved it, I really did. And I was determined that I would do Cornell's joint MA phil / JD degree, because I didn't want to abandon philosophy completely. And then two things happened that changed everything. The first was a response for Cornell's philo department. I sent them an inquiry into the joint degree program, and they replied by telling me that in fact that program no longer existed. Sorry. Oh... well, um, shoot. What now? (at this point I was doing enough work on my own--and loving it-- and enough to apply to the joint program that my heart was set on it). What a disappointment.

And then the second thing happened. I had sent Harry some comments on something (I can't seem to remember for what) and that prompted a response from Harry saying that I should really consider going to grad school. No, he doesn't usually say this, but yes, he thinks I should go (both because he thought I would like it and would do well there). Really? Had he told me that 3-6 months ago, I would have flat out said not a chance. But now, well now I was in a different place. It was like God was warming me up to that idea all along. I was still a bit skeptical though. Really? I can't do philosophy. I can study it, surely, but I can't contribute anything myself... can I? The seed was planted.

And then the GRE fiasco happened (with the strikes and almost not being able to go). When I almost couldn't get to the test, it became very obvious to me how much I wanted to go to philo grad school. Before I was going to apply, see if I got in, and then decide if maybe I wanted to do it. Now I wanted to go, no need for further contemplation. And just as God kept me out of law school (without freaking me out by shutting me out of all the schools), He got me to the test and helped me pass it (I had a week to study, so for all intensive purposes, I had to wing it). And that's when I started to get my heart set on getting in. It seemed obvious that God was pushing me down that road, a road I would have never dreamed for myself in a million years. I was supposed to go to law school, and I was sure that God wanted me there too. And then all of this happened, and it all made sense. I studied philosophy because I thought it would be good prep for law school, but I had no idea that God wanted me to be doing that all along. Go figure.

Even though I could feel God pushing me in that direction, I was skeptical that it would work out. Sure, I didn't doubt that God could get me in if He really wanted to, but what if He didn't? Do you know how hard it is to get in? It's hard, very hard. And you know what, I wasn't prepared. It be honest, I consider it a miracle that UNC accepted me. Sure they liked my letters and the writing sample, but I'm sure they liked the letters and writing sample of a bunch of the over 300 applicants, and they can only take 7-8. I don't care how qualified you are, it's going to take a miracle (or for the less supernaturally inclined, a good deal of luck). And a miracle it is.

Now something happened over Christmas break that I completely forgot about, and it was something I'd never seen before. When we were driving around Normandy, we saw the most amazing double rainbow. I rarely see rainbows these days, and this one was a perfect double arch. It was beyond cool. What I didn't know was what my mom told me this past Friday. This is the year of the double rainbows, and they will be a sign of God's favor and a new beginning. My mom said that when she saw it she knew immediately that my switch to philosophy was going to work out. She was certain that God was going to get me in to the school He wanted me at, and that would be my new beginning. Looking back on it, it makes sense. Sure, you can call it a coincidence, but I have never seen a double rainbow before, and I may never again, and this is supposed to be the year. I can take a hint. Thank you God. You are too good. Now show me how to use this amazing opportunity to serve you better. I'm ready.